The Healing Power of Laughing At Yourself

Dr. Caroline Leaf
2 min readJun 27, 2022

In a recent podcast (episode #394), I talked about the benefits of laughing at yourself.

Laughter neutralizes situations, and a neutral situation is a safe space where deep meaningful relationships are made and strengthened. Laughing at oneself shows vulnerability, honesty, and humility. It tells your loved ones that you know you are not perfect. Laughing, instead of getting upset or defensive, can form a bond of trust with the people in your life.

In my own life, this has become even more important as my four children have grown into young adults. It is a way to reflect back on the past, which allows me to make sense of some of the good, and the bad, decisions my husband and I made as parents. Listening, apologizing, laughing, and even doubling over in awe at some of these reflections has helped us as a family make sense of what in some cases really didn’t make sense. By laughing at ourselves we have created a safe space within which to hear our children’s needs and for us to explain our motivations.

Something I would always tell the parents of the patients in my private practice is that we need to earn our children’s respect. And this is true for any relationship! Laughing at our own mistakes makes us accessible, real and open, which are necessary for relationships that bring healing and success in life. Laughing at ourselves sends the message that “it is ok, we all make mistakes and everything can be resolved in some way.”

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Dr. Caroline Leaf

Mental health expert. I have spent the last 30+ years researching ways to help people manage mental health issues in school, work, and life: drleaf.com