How to Find Meaning Again After Tragedy

In a recent podcast (episode #393), I talked to N.Y. Times best-selling author Donald Miller about becoming the hero of our own narratives, how to find meaning again after a tragedy, what defines a meaningful life, and so much more.

In his amazing new book, Hero On a Mission: A Path to a Meaningful Life, Donald talks about how there are four characters in every story: the victim, the villain, the hero, and the guide. These four characters live inside all of us.

By examining the roles we play in our own lives and what characters we adopt, we can use the concept of a “story” to create meaning and purpose in our lives. Although this may seem overwhelming at first, it is also incredibly empowering, because it means that we can write our own story — we get to define our own role and give our life meaning.

Different character roles will have a different impact on our life story. For example, if we just play the victim, we’re doomed to fail because we believe that our life is defined by failure. If we play the villain, we will not create genuine bonds that give life meaning because the villain makes other people feel small and tries to control them. But, if we choose to play the hero or guide, our lives can flourish. The hero is willing to accept the challenge, and work on themselves to overcome that challenge even when life is hard, while the guide helps the hero win by sharing their knowledge and experience — the guide finds meaning by helping other people win.